DR. WALLACE: I'm a 15-year-old girl and live near my high school where I'm in the ninth grade. All of my friends go to the school and I like it so far. But my boyfriend attends a different high school, which is only two minutes away from my dad's work. My boyfriend wants me to transfer there so we can spend more time together.

What do you think? Should I stay where I am or transfer? — Mandy, Garden Grove, Calif.

MANDY: Stay put! It would not be in your best interest to attend a different high school just to be closer to a boyfriend.

Switching high schools is no easy task. I seriously doubt that you would be permitted to go to a different high school just because your father works close. Students must attend schools where they reside, period. It would require a special hearing to allow you to start at the high school attended by your boyfriend. At the hearing, your request would be denied.

FASTING IS NOT THE ANSWER TO LOSING WEIGHT

DR. WALLACE: Like most teenage girls, I am struggling to maintain a proper weight. That's because I enjoy eating the wrong foods. Yes, I know I should have a "nourishing, well-balanced diet chock full of fruits and veggies," but I don't. I eat far too many french fries (piping hot with tons of salt) and other so-called junk foods.

I've been thinking of fasting for a week or so when I want to become slim. Of course, I would drink a lot of water to help flush away my extra pounds. Your comments, please. — Pam, Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

PAM: Lengthy fasting is simply not a good idea for most people, especially teens. Fasting will reduce body weight, but also involves a loss of muscle tissue along with fat. This could be dangerous, especially during adolescence, when the body is undergoing rapid growth spurts and should be adding lean tissue. Also, there is medical evidence that fasting could produce a loss of bone tissue that could stunt normal growth.

You know the answer to maintain proper weight — "a nourishing, well-balanced diet chock full of fruits and veggies." It takes dedication and determination to maintain a proper diet. There is no effective shortcut.

TEACHERS HAVE NO BUSINESS DATING THEIR STUDENTS

DR. WALLACE: You told a high school girl to tell the school principal that a male teacher asked her for a date. I think this was a stupid answer. If she were 17 or 18, she is no longer considered a girl; she's a young woman. Teachers have the right to date anyone they choose.

What if the guy had been a 22-year-old mechanic and the girl an 18-year-old senior? Would you have told the girl to complain to the owner of the repair shop? Of course not! Wake up, Dr. Wallace! — Derek, Portland, Ore.

DEREK: Your analogy isn't the least bit comparable. A teacher is in an extraordinarily sensitive and influential position in relation to his or her students. High school teachers have no business asking their students to go out with them — it's unethical, unprofessional and just plain wrong. Teachers who cross this line should be dismissed.

Students are in school to receive an education, and nothing could muddy their ability to do so faster than becoming romantically involved with a teacher. It warps the entire relationship. The worst-case scenario is a teacher being so unscrupulous that he or she uses the promise of a higher grade — or the threat of a lower one — to cajole a student into going on a date. But even short of such a crass breach of ethics, teachers have no business taking advantage of a student's implicit trust by soliciting a date.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE TUESDAY, OCTOBER 7, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Tell Mom about Brother's Smoking Habit

DR. WALLACE: My 14-year-old brother is hanging with a group of "cool" guys who think they are "adult" by smoking cigarettes. My brother has started smoking. I've talked to him and said that if he didn't stop he would become addicted. This made him laugh. He responded by telling me that his friend's father told him that it takes about six months to get hooked on tobacco products, and that he will stop smoking before that time. He has been smoking for about a month.

Our mom is a single mother who works an evening shift cleaning in an office building to support our family; she is not aware of my brother's smoking habit. My brother has asked me not to tell our mother about his smoking.

Dr. Wallace, I have two questions and I really need for you to answer them. First, how long does it take for someone to become addicted to cigarettes if they smoke regularly? Second, should I tell our mother that my brother is smoking? — Nameless, Galesburg, Ill.

NAMELESS: A report in the British Medical Association Journal of Tobacco Control confirmed a suspicion that it is possible to become addicted to tobacco even after a minimum number of experiences inhaling cigarette smoke. They quote a study that followed 681 children, aged 12 and 13, in Massachusetts for one year and tracked their smoking habits.

Twenty-five percent of first-time smokers said they had addictive symptoms within two weeks of starting to smoke, while several said their addictive signs began within a few days. Sixty-two percent said these first symptoms made them start smoking daily. Nicotine is a highly addictive habit.

Discuss your brother's misadventure with your mother today.

RESPONSIBLE TEEN SHOULD BE ABLE TO GO ON DATE

DR. WALLACE: My parents and I are having a disagreement and I need your opinion. I have been interested in Matt for about a year now. We had a class together last year and both took summer school. Now we are in the band together this year. Well, he finally asked me out about a month ago. Great, right?

Not really. My dad thinks it's "inappropriate" for me to date until I'm 16 — and I will be 16 in about seven months. My mom agrees with me, however, and would like me to go out with Matt.

I am section leader in band. I have a 4.0 grade point average and participate actively in my church. Do you think I should be allowed to date Matt? — Nameless, Orlando, Fla.

NAMELESS: I have never favored parents that make the calendar the determining factor in deciding when their child can date. A teenager's maturity, dependability and trustworthiness are far better gauges. Some teens are mature enough to date when they're 14, while others need to wait a few more years.

This is not an easy decision for a parent to make, but in your case, I'd have to agree with your mom.

P.S.: I'm impressed with your GPA!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 8, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Grandparents Think Family is Crazy to Talk with Dog

DR. WALLACE: Please do our family a huge favor. We have a golden Labrador retriever that is like a member of our family; we all love this pooch very much. Our lab doesn't bark in English, but she does understand our language. If we ask her if she wants to go for a ride in the car, she will bark, run to the door and wag her tail. If we ask her if she is hungry, she will go to the kitchen and wait by her food bowl. When we tell her to get her rag doll, she will run to the bedroom and return with the doll in her mouth.

A long time ago, my dad said you received a letter from a reader who had a dog that could understand our language and respond to it. Please print it again. When my grandparents (dad's parents) visit our house, they call us "crazy" for talking to our pooch. They don't believe the dog understands, even though they can observe her behavior.

This issue is so disturbing that the last time they visited they became angry and left without even saying goodbye. Their last words were: "We've got a crazy family here, run by a stupid dog!"

Please prove our family is not crazy. I will mail your response to my grandparents and hope they will change their mind and return. — Nameless, Holland, Mich.

NAMELESS: There was a time when I, too, thought that dogs could not understand the spoken word, but De from Willmar, Minn., changed my mind. Let's hope the following story will have the same effect on your grandparents — they are important members of your family and you need each other.

DR. WALLACE: Our family members always enjoy your column and usually agree with you. But we must take issue with your statement that dogs don't understand spoken words, only tone of voice (loud, harsh words cause a dog to cower, while soft words encourage tail-wagging).

Our pet/dog friend, Snooper, is part golden lab and part golden retriever, the same mixed breed as our previous pet. We marvel at the intelligence of these pets — their trainability and their desire to please. These two dogs have been loyal, loving, obedient and wonderful companions who have definitely improved our lives. They are well worth the extra effort, responsibility and care.

Now, as to why we disagree with you. If any of the three of us adults, in speaking with one another, mentions the words "out," "ride in the car," "go to the lake," or "treat," we have our dog's full attention and she comes to us, wanting to be included even though the words weren't spoken directly to her. When a pizza is ordered and she is told, she sits at the window watching for the delivery person.

Following each of her two dog food meals per day, she is given a dog biscuit, which is inserted into a big red ball with preformed holes. This morning, in a deliberate monotone, I mentioned to our son, "I need the big red ball." Our pet immediately disappeared into the other room and came back carrying the ball, dropping it at my feet.

Just because dogs can't talk doesn't mean that they cannot listen and understand. Please reconsider your opinion that "dogs do not understand actual words."

Keep up the good words and works of your column; your integrity and ethical values instruct your readers in how to "live well." Thank you. — De, Willmar, Minn.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE THURSDAY, OCTOBER 9, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Teen's Boyfriend Continues to Pressure Her for Sex

DR. WALLACE: I'm 16 and have been dating my boyfriend for over a year. He is a great guy and I love him very much. I dream that we will someday be married, have three children (two girls and a boy) and live in a white house by a blue lake.

Our family is very religious, and I do believe that sex should be saved until after marriage. The only major flaw for my boyfriend is that he is super aggressive sexually. Almost every time we're together, he tries his best to convince me to have sex because we are in love. I always say no, but as time goes by, I find this more difficult. Any moral support you can give me will be appreciated. — Nameless, Dothan, Ala.

NAMELESS: Please read the following letter from Lisa. It has the moral support you're needing. Those who have "been there and done that" often offer great advice. Her letter is an excellent example:

DR. WALLACE: I've been reading your column for about a year, and I can really identify with girls who are being pressured by their boyfriends to have sex because they're in love.

When I was 15, I met my hero. He was cute, bright and had a wonderful sense of humor. I fell head-over-heels in love with him. Two months after I accepted his going-steady ring, he started getting frisky. I told him I was a virgin and wanted to stay that way, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. Then one night I gave in — he threatened to leave me if I wouldn't "prove my love" for him.

For the next three months, we had sex almost every time we were together. I thought we were pregnant-safe because he used protection, but I still got pregnant. I was devastated when I told my boyfriend (he was 16) and he said he was sorry, but he didn't know how to help me. Since I knew his mom really well, I had a talk with her. A month later they moved to England where his mother was born.

Finally, I had to tell my parents. It was the worst day of my life. They were terribly disappointed, but did all they could to help me. I had my baby and gave it up for adoption.

I am now 17 and living at home with my parents, but I feel like an old woman at times. I wonder about my baby, feel cheated that the baby's father got off without a hassle, and feel used and abused — physically and emotionally. I also feel stupid for allowing my boyfriend to convince me that sex is love. I knew that it wasn't, but I didn't want to lose my boyfriend. I'm positive that if I had continued to say no, we would still be a couple and he wouldn't be living in England.

Dr. Wallace, I'm writing this letter to all the girls who are being pressured into having sex with their boyfriends. Please, girls, don't fall for the "If you really love me, you'd do it" line. Take it from someone who paid a heavy price for a learning experience. Whenever a guy is trying to convince you that sex is love, just substitute the word "lust" for "love." — Lisa, Philadelphia.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE FRIDAY, OCTOBER 10, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Teen Wants to Move to Escape her Past Reputation

DR. WALLACE: I'm a 16-year-old girl who has earned a bad reputation. I did an awful lot of things in the past that I'm not proud of and I'm sorry for my "sins." The problem is that all the kids at my school know about my past. Girls avoid me like the plague, while guys call me names or call me on the phone to ask me out for only one thing: sex.

I live with my mother who has been divorced three times and recently married her fourth husband. He seems all right, but he does have a drinking problem. I would like to move out of this town and get a fresh start. My grandmother is aware of my troubled past and has encouraged me to move in with her. My mom also knows of my past, but wants me to stay and overcome my bad reputation by standing up to those who speak out against me. I have changed my behavior, but my status still follows me; all of this really makes me feel terrible.

Yes, I did stupid things, but I learned my very painful lesson: Sex does not mean love. My only saving grace is that I did not become pregnant or pick up a sexually transmitted disease. I want to leave this town and start fresh somewhere else. Trust me, I have learned my lesson. If you advise me to go to my grandmother's, I will. But if you tell me to stand up against my name callers, I'll give all this a little more thought. Be kind and answer my letter. If you encourage me to move, I'll wait until semester break so I won't lose credits. I want my high school diploma. — Nameless, Dallas.

NAMELESS: Reputations can be ruined in a short time; they can be mended, but it takes much longer. I'm happy that you have begun this process — doing so requires a great deal of courage even when most people are pulling for you. But when your whole school seems to be against you, the task can be formidable.

I don't often recommend that a young person leave a parent and move away from home, but in your case I think this is best. With mom's fourth husband having a drinking problem, I don't think you'll get the support you need at home. When you do leave, make sure you keep in close contact with your mother. She needs you!

PARENTS NEED TO STOP SISTER FROM GOING INTO CLOSET

DR. WALLACE: I'm 18 and my younger sister is 15. We share the same room, but have separate closets. I work part-time after school and all day Saturday as a waitress at a local restaurant. With salary and occasional tips, I earn over $100 a week. This gives me independence. I own my car, pay its expenses, and buy my own clothes.

My sister doesn't earn a penny and gets an allowance; she spends it on movies and junk food. When she wants to dress up, she "borrows" my clothes without asking. This really bugs me. I told her to stop wearing my clothes, but she doesn't pay any attention.

Last week I put a lock on my closet door and thought I had the problem solved, but my parents cut the lock off with bolt cutters. They said that a family doesn't lock doors to keep other family members out.

I think my parents are being unfair. Your comments, please. — Nameless, Nashua, N.H.

NAMELESS: Locked doors may send an unwanted emotional message. Your parents need to address your concerns. They should tell your sister she can't wear your clothes without permission. That would be the best, and simplest, solution. Mom and dad are negligent if they don't do this.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE SATURDAY, OCTOBER 11, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Teen's Boyfriend had a Past with LSD and other Drugs

DR. WALLACE: The guy I'm dating has straightened out his life. He used to do hard drugs, but while in jail he started reading the Bible and then became a born-again Christian. Believe me when I say that this guy has turned his life around.

I didn't know him when he was doing drugs, but from listening to his family, he was a nasty dude. Frank doesn't say much about his drug days, but one night he did tell me that LSD was his drug of choice — that's all he said. Since I didn't want to get into a huge discussion on his past drug habit, I was glad when he changed the subject.

I've heard about LSD, but I don't know much about it or the effects it has on the human body. I'd really like to know because there is the possibility that Frank could become my husband and the father of my children. Can you give me some information about LSD? — Nameless, Mansfield, Ohio.

NAMELESS: LSD stands for lysergic acid diethylamide. In 1943, the drug was first used experimentally by doctors to treat people with various mental disorders as well as alcoholics, epileptics and terminally ill cancer patients. These experiments were largely unsuccessful, but the drug started finding its way out of the clinics by the early 1960s and became popular among thrill-seekers.

LSD is a potent hallucinogen — a drug that causes users to see, hear, smell, or even feel things that aren't really there. Other effects of LSD include higher blood pressure, faster heartbeat, loss of muscle control or coordination, nausea, dizziness, chills and headaches.

Because of its chemical makeup, LSD may be stored in the body and unexpectedly released into the system days, weeks or even months after ingestion. "Flashbacks" have been reported to occur up to 20 months later. Simply put, LSD is plain nasty.

AVOID TELLING FRIEND OF FEELINGS ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND

DR. WALLACE: My best friend, Becky, has a boyfriend named Doug. Lately, I have become very interested in going out with him if they should ever break up. Would it be stupid of me to tell Becky that I'd like to go out with Doug if they ever split up? It's hard to keep this secret bottled up inside me. — Nameless, Hammond, La.

NAMELESS: Keep your secret bottled up, or Becky will become your ex-best friend instantly.

SISTER WILL BE READY TO DATE WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT

DR. WALLACE: My sister is a very pretty girl and has a wonderful figure. Her problem is that she isn't interested in dating, even though she's 17. All she thinks about is studying, playing the piano and being a model. I'm sure she isn't dating because she's shy.

To help her start dating, I wonder if it would be proper for me to ask my boyfriend's friend to ask her out. They've seen each other and both think the other is cute. I'm 18 and a first-year student at Northern Illinois University. Dating is great fun and I'd like my sister to share in that enjoyment. — Nameless, DeKalb, Ill.

NAMELESS: Ask your sister if she wants you to set her up. If she says yes, then proceed with your plan. But if she isn't interested, forget it. Many 17-year-olds have chosen not to begin dating; all this means is that they have minds of their own. Believe me, when your sister's ready to date, she won't need you to play cupid.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.