I Want Girls to Learn From my Mistake by Dr. Robert Wallace on Creators.com

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DR. WALLACE: I am not writing to ask for advice. I am writing to help other girls who may be making the same mistake I made. Maybe if I had seen a letter like this a few years ago, my life might be different now.

I had a reputation of being easy when I was in high school. It started when I was 16, because my boyfriend and I thought we needed to prove our love. After we broke up, he told all his friends we had sex. Word got around, and I had a lot of guys calling me. At first, it didn't bother me because I very much wanted a boyfriend, so I would give these boys what they wanted — sex.

I was WRONG! I didn't have real dates like other girls. Other girls got asked to movies and school dances and got to meet their boyfriend's family. I was asked to go for rides down dark, lonely roads. I was never asked out for a romantic evening. All these boys wanted was sex. No boy asked me to the prom. Guys were embarrassed to be seen with me in public.

I wish I knew then what I know now. My self-respect should have been much more important than having a boyfriend. It was a hard lesson to learn. I missed a lot of good times in high school. I just hope that all of the girls who read this will learn from my mistake. — Nameless, Cleveland.

NAMELESS: Thank you for having the courage to write this letter and reach out to other young women. Your story shows vividly how sad, lonely and frightening it can be to suddenly have a reputation as sexually easy.

Even more, it demonstrates the cruel mindset of too many guys who will blithely ignore a female's feelings en route to sexual conquest.

A CLUB MEMBER SLASHED A PAINTING

DR. WALLACE: Our school club held an initiation breakfast in one of the nicer restaurants in our area.

During the ceremony, one of the girls damaged a small painting that was hanging in the eating area. She slashed it with a knife.

The owner of the restaurant sent a letter to the principal of our school demanding payment for the painting ($75) and informed him that our school functions will no longer be allowed without a $100 deposit.

This incident has hurt our club's reputation (everyone in school was talking about it). As the club's president, I am asking you for the best solution in this mess. We really can't afford $75 and don't know who did the damage. What should we do? — Nameless, San Francisco.

NAMELESS: Call a meeting of your club immediately and have the secretary draft a letter of apology. Mail it to the restaurant owner. And in the letter inform the owner that the money will be paid. Send a copy to your principal.

Then have a fast fundraising event to reimburse the restaurant owner — teens know how to raise funds. Once you have the money, stop by the restaurant, give it to the owner and apologize again. Case closed.

ALCOHOL IS A DEPRESSANT DRUG

DR. WALLACE: You said that alcohol is a depressant. I don't drink much, but when I have a drink, I get a good feeling "rush." I never feel depressed! — Nameless, Indianapolis.

NAMELESS: Alcohol is a depressant drug, and the temporary "rush" you experience will be short-lived if you continue to drink. Alcohol ultimately slows down vital activities of the central nervous system, and in time, its sedative effects begin to take over and the rush fades. The good feeling can turn to self-pity, loneliness and guilt.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.